Must. leave. the. candy. alone.

I have sugar issues. In general, I have ideal eating habits... I don't really deprive myself of anything, I just keep my meals balanced and I follow the food pyramid pretty well. You know, the pyramid in kindergarten. So what if it doesn't have a building block for Diet Coke and liquor... my point is, I eat salad and I eat burgers (on whole wheat buns and with light mayo).

But I am a candy FIEND. Right now, I have: sea salt caramels (about 40 of them), 2 lbs of Goyart chocolates, and 10 lbs of Jelly Belly beans. My co-worker keeps pushing me to finish off his Toblerone and Ferraro candies and I have Karl Bissinger's next door. I need to stop with the suge before I end up like Cookie Monster on Sesame Street. You know why Cookie Monster was always naked? He couldn't fit into his clothes. He was so lucky that he didn't reach 1000lbs and end up like one of those people that have to be airlifted out of their bedroom.

Actually, the real reason why the suge is the devil's sweetness is because of the headaches if you don't eat more sugar. Sugar withdrawls are nasty.

Lord, beer me strength for the rest of the day. I have two and a half hours. And my boss is playing The Devil Wears Prada for the fourth time in a row today.